My At-Home Insemination

Well, friends, it’s done. I did it. Ahhhh.

If you read my blog post about the process, I told you that I got 2 vials for this round of at home inseminations. I chose to do it at home for the first (and hopefully only) round because it could be more comfortable. I could be in my own personal space, in my own bed, with my chosen surroundings. Not in a sterile doctors office. I also chose to do 2 vials within a few days time because I wanted to up the chances of it working. As I mentioned in my other post, it’s basically like a couple finding out they’re fertile so they fuck like rabbits for a few days haha. 

Because the tank got here early, I started testing my fertility early. That way I could start sooner if I was in the perfect window. Friday got a “Low Fertility” response on my Clearblue Connected Ovulation test. Which is shown by an open O symbol on the test. I really like this Ovulation test because I want it plain and simple. I don’t want to have to try to read lines and shit. Just tell me yes or no, haha.

Of course, my overthinking ass got slightly worried about timing. I tested Saturday morning, low fertility. The test itself says to test in the morning, which I do, but I read online that your hormones tend to peak later in the day. So I decided to take another one around 1 pm and I got my first High Fertility response! This is shown as a flashing smiley face, as seen below.

From everything I’ve read, it’s best to start having sex, or in my case inseminating, the day I see that response and over the next couple days. The method of doing it at home is called ICI (Intracervical Insemination) in which you’re using a syringe to insert the sperm. The other option is IUI (Intrauterine) in which your doctor inserts the sperm directly into the uterus using a speculum and catheter. It’s much more pricey to do, and you don’t do it at home.

The Insemination Process

The tank arrives in a box and it’s recommended you don’t open the tank until you’re ready. Everything will be good in the tank for a week. They shipped my tank Thursday and was good until Thursday. My account rep told me to wait to open until I plan to use one so the tank stays cold as fuck.

In the box:

• The tank holding the baby making juice.
• The genetic testing of the donor, which is available to you online when searching but I think for assurance and should your doctor need to see it.
• Instructions for checking the contents, how to store, how to thaw/use, and instructions for shipping the box back.

My Insemination:

This is the place where people like my father, or the likes, would want to stop reading. ?

Ps…those pants used to be tight. WOOP! Anywho, on with the insemination.

I did the first vial on the first night I got a Fertile response on the test, Saturday, April 6th. I did the second vial Monday, April 8th because I got a Peak Fertility response on my OPK test. The process was actually pretty easy. Much easier than I thought it would be. The thawing process was honestly the most nerve-wracking. If you do just one vial, you can use the plastic holder it comes it to place it in water perfectly. But when there’s multiple, the 2nd one needed to stay in the tank. So it made it tough trying to figure out how to thaw it without letting water get in. The 2nd time, and using the holder, was SO much easier!

Once thawed, I transferred it to the specimen cup that Mosie Baby gives you. Next, to make sure there’s no air, I pulled back and pressed the plunger in to remove all air. Then sucked up all of the specimen, keeping the tip in it at all times to avoid air. Then turned it tip side up tapped to remove air bubbles and pushed it up so the sperm was to the very end.

The videos I’ve seen of people doing at-home insemination, most people are sent the small needleless syringes. I am SO fucking glad that I ordered the Mosie Baby Kit because it was much more comfortable. It fit and made me feel more confident the sperm would stay in there. It’s about the size of a tampon applicator, so it’s not uncomfortable at all. It’s also not in for very long. You insert it, slowly push out the sperm, leave it for 15 seconds ish, and then remove. BOOM! Baby making in progress.

I laid with my hips up, watching Schitts Creek, because it’s the best thing on TV.

And now we fucking wait, and I attempt to not go crazy, haha.